Observers have noted a sudden change in V. P. Harris’ speeches. Long known for her creative use of syntax, now her vocabulary is evolving.

While Harris is fond of the phrase being”unburdened by what has been,” she recently finished a speech by saying she is “disencumbered via what has subsisted.”

Noted Influencer, Edward Thinkerton, believes one of her advisors must have introduced her to a thesaurus.

“Before getting handed the nomination, her speaking vocabulary was limited to about 250 words, but now new words started to appear, and not necessarily for the better,” Thinkerton said.

Another example of Harris’s expanded vocabulary came when she was touting the Biden/Harris’ administration’s community bank investment program.

 “We are beginning to see our investment into community banks is working because these banks are in our communes, our towns, and villages and so they know the inhabitants and denizens of communities, and help the citizenry to hoard a cache of cash to help the village. And this is called capitalism, but the good kind.” 

While the V.P. is still rolling out the new “glib” Harris, initial reports are that most “citizenry” still consider her speaking skills below that of a myna bird.

Cackle Update: Having given up on using aversive conditioning and hypnosis to eliminate the Vice President’s cackle, her handlers are now exploring a cackle-ectomy. While such a surgery has never been performed, they have located a gender-affirming surgeon willing to perform the operation.

“I’ll give it a whirl,” Dr. Les Mann said. “It wouldn’t be the strangest surgery I’ve ever performed. Not by a long shot.”