As North Korean soldiers entered Ukraine to fight for Putin, they encountered western culture and quickly got addicted. Here is some of what they discovered during their invasion.

Internet Content – The internet is not popular in North Korea since it contains only Kim Jong Un speeches, and golfing videos of Un hitting only holes-in-one. However, the typical NK soldier’s world exploded once he got western internet. Unfortunately, without translation, the soldiers thought cat videos were a kind of food channel.

Adult content – When one North Korean soldier discovered OnlyFans models on the internet, he exclaimed, “O brave new world, that has such creatures in it! ” NK soldiers were pleased that porn sites accept the won and every other form of currency, including bitcoin, which they don’t understand just like everyone else.

There is Food – Even in the Ukrainian war zone there is more food than in North Korea, and NKs found out that life is more than fermented cabbage and rice. After tasting beef for the first time, one soldier said, “This is almost as good as dog.”

Star Wars – Surfing streaming sites, NKs discovered Star Wars movies. After watching the series the NKs all agreed that Jar Jar Binks nearly made Episode 1: A Phantom Menance unwatchable, and that Kathleen Kennedy ruined the franchise.

Peanut the Squirrel – On the internet, NKs followed the saga of Peanut the Squirrel and were shocked that the squirrel was dissected, instead of roasted and served with kimchi. Same for his trash-panda friend, Pete.

LinkedIn – Some NKs joined LinkedIn and soon regretted it.

Travel Offers – NK soldiers began getting travel offers to visit Ukraine, even though they are already marching across the country. They also keep getting ads for AK-47s, which they have plenty of.

Nextdoor – Joining the social networking site for neighborhoods, NKs’ email boxes were suddenly inundated with messages from old ladies who claim they are hearing gunshots.

As captured laptops spread through the North Korean troops, the invasion progress has slowed because soldiers keep stopping to check if they got likes for their latest social media post.

At publishing time, the most frequent internet search among NKs is, “How to defect to the west.”