FOUR MAGI CAME FROM THE EAST NOT THREE: In addition to Caspar, Melchior, and Balthazar, there was Steve. However, Steve was a back-in parker which annoyed the other camels since they did not like being nose to tail with Steve’s camel. Since Steve would not park like normal people, the other wise men snuck off and left him.

STEVE’S GIFT TO THE BABY JESUS: While cancelling Steve seems cruel, it was probably part of a divine plan, since his gift for the baby Jesus was a lifetime pass to Herrod’s Royal Buffet Restaurant.

XMAS – You may have seen Christmas spelled as “Xmas.” Originally, this abbreviation came about because chi (X)is the Greek letter at the beginning of cristos, which then became Christ. More recently, Xmas is making a comeback because Elon Musk bought the naming rights to Christmas.

SANTA CLAUS WASN’T ALWAYS JOLLY AND FAT: Originally, images of Santa showed him as thin, bedraggled, wearing green, and looking like he is jonesing for a fix. However, because original Coke included cocaine, Coca-Cola did not want their product associated with the wasted drug addicts it was creating. Hence, the color change and the addition of obesity in their ads.

TO PSILOCYBIN USERS THE SONG TWELVE DAYS OF CHRISTMAS ACTUALLY MAKES SENSE: Oregon psilocybin therapists have discovered that after eating magic mushrooms the most cryptic of Christmas songs is actually quite profound. Also, Portland’s homeless policies make sense until the hallucinogen wears off.

Share these fun facts at your office parties, family gatherings, or with your psilocybin therapist.

Merry Xmas* from the meridian-street.com staff.

*This spelling of Christmas is just in case Musk ever wants to buy this site for a billion dollars.