Oregon’s Governor Tina Kotek was incensed when she learned that Rosie O’Donnell had moved to Ireland to escape the horror of life in America.

“It’s green and clean here and it’s warm,” O’Donnell said about Ireland. “I mean the people are warm but it’s cold outside.”

“Oregon’s green too,” Kotek pointed out. “Because It rains just as much as in Ireland. If you like dreary winters then we’re the state for you. And did I mention that our beaches are just as beautiful and our ocean is too cold to swim in, just like Ireland?”

Trying to lure O’Donnell back, Governor Kotek pointed out that Oregonians are nice people too, when not rioting, and that Oregon’s gun laws are at least as restrictive as Irish laws.

“You’d love Portland, and you can pick up an office building for a song if you want to build an awesome flat. You won’t find a more socialist state north of California than Oregon.”*

When it was pointed out that 41% of Oregonians voted for Donald Trump, who drove O’Donnell out of America, the Governor explained.

“Almost all of those right-wingers are in eastern Oregon and we ignore that part of the state. They all just yammer on about parent rights, guns, God, freedom, yadda, yadda, yadda. If we didn’t need their tax revenue for our Progressive agenda, we’d let them join Idaho.”

As O’Donnell left an Irish pub she pulled her coat tighter and mumbled, “Is it going to be this wet and cold all winter?”

“And spring, summer, and fall,” a local said. “But the rain gets warmer in August.”

At publication time it was unclear if the Progressive O’Donnell was aware of Ireland’s restrictive abortion laws.

*Note: Washington Governor Ferguson immediately disputed Oregon’s claim to be more socialist.