Recently, Akusound Inc., admitted the images on its prenatal ultrasound equipment are not actually the fetus, but just an inkblot.

“It’s expensive to make equipment that can actually scan something that small,” spokesperson Rory Schock said. “Besides, parents only correctly identified the head 50% of the time anyway.”

When asked if the photos provided to parents are lies, Schock said, “No.”

“That’s the thing about projective tests. Whatever you say it is, it is. When a mom points at part of a blot and says ‘that’s the head,’ our technicians confirm it. The mothers are so proud they got it right. Sort of.”

While the manufacturer expected parents to be angry, instead many were relieved.

“Honestly, I couldn’t tell what was what,” one mother confessed. “I just pretended and said, ‘How cute.’ But I didn’t know if it was its head or its butt.”

Renowned psychologist Sigmund Noodle, defended Akusound’s fraud.

“With an inkblot, the parents can project their true wishes onto the image, and so not be disappointed,” Noodle said. “Besides, using inkblots provides a measure of parental mental health. Using inkblots for psychological insights is recognized as a valid and reliable tool.”*

Later, it was discovered that Dr. Noodle is a paid consultant for Akusound and provided the inkblot for their machines.

*No it’s not.