Apparently in response to the No Kings Movement, Target is featuring chess sets where the king piece has been replaced by a second “queen.”

One queen is made of traditional plastic, while the other queen is draped in tasteful, form fitting, satins, studded with rhinestones, wearing a giant wig, and more makeup than a Barnum and Bailey circus clown.*

“This is not a gay thing,” Target spokesperson Jane Doe,” said.** “This was supposed to be an anti-Trump thing. We had no idea that one piece would be, ahhhhh, controversial.”

According to the instructions, the Two Queens Chess Set is played like regular chess for most of the pieces, but without the King, the special queen is the piece that can move one square at at time, in any direction.

In addition, the special queen is the only piece that can share a square with the little pieces, called “pawns.” Once they share a square, the “pawns” convert to the special queen’s side. Converted “pawns” then blindly follow the special queen around.

Converted pawns are indicated with little wigs, either rainbow colored or hot pink, depending on whether you are playing white or black.

The No Kings game can end in two ways. First, if the special queen is trapped: Checkmate. Second, if the special queen gathers all the opposing players “pawns” in a circle.**

At publishing time the special edition game was flying off the shelves in San Francisco but unavailable in Salt Lake City.

*Deluxe editions come with multiple outfits and wigs, so you can change the clothes on your queens.

**We suspect this is not her real name but she does not want to get cancelled.