Tired of hearing the same old worn out Christmas music with its outdated song lyrics? Try this version of the most popular Christmas song in history.

Blue Cities Carol (sung to the tune of I’m Dreaming Of A White Christmas)

[verse 1]

I’m dreaming of a bright new year

Where all the streets are urine free

And the only feces, is K-9 feces

With an air of normalcy

[verse 2]

I’m dreaming of a safe city

Like when the parks were clean and fun

And kids could play safely and roam…

And not find cocaine and a gun

[verse 3]

I’m moving to a red city

Where drug laws are still enforced

Where the people’s genders, have just two members

And lewd actions’ not endorsed

[verse 4]

I’m dreaming of a bright new year

Where all the streets are homeless free

May your stores be open with goods…

And may all you shop in complete safety